The last couple days have been really rough.

First, I really failed to meet my manager’s expectations. Second, I failed the CISSP. With that said, I’m ready to start the next chapter of my life. I knew going into the test that I wasn’t going to do too well. I had spent about four months studying whenever I had some free time, but ultimately, I dropped the ball.

This past week I learned that there are something I can’t control. I can’t control how my manager feels about me. I can’t control how he perceives the words that come out of my mouth. I can, however, control who my manager is. With that said, I start a new journey at work with a brand new manager on May 29th. I’m really looking forward to this new opportunity and excited to see where my career goes from here. The one thing I’ve determined is that I’m going to learn from my mistakes with my current manager and do my absolute best to impress my new manager.

As far as the CISSP, well I’m not entirely convinced that I want to focus on security. I started my security interest in 2015. After a few years of taking a few classes and obtaining both a CEH and Security+, I’m still not doing any “official” infosec work professionally. So, what I’m trying to say, it’s probably for the best. My previous company paid for the exam before I left, and I didn’t want to just let 700 dollars to go to waste. I gave it my all. . . it just wasn’t enough.

Failure sucks. I wont lie, I am bummed about my recent failures. I don’t like to let people down, and I feel that by having these failures, I’ve let a few people down. I can dwell and be sad, but that just doesn’t make any sense to me. While I’ve been studying for my test, I also developed a new passion to finally break free and start my own thing. I’ve been trying to focus what that thing is and today, after I failed, I received absolute clarity.

So, for the next few months, I will be taking a deep dive into that new chapter of my life. I’m glad I’m getting the closure I need, but I’m even more excited to do something that I’m going to be passionate about. I really think that this new direction for me is going to make me a lot happier and the impact I’ll be able to make will be extremely rewarding.

Stay tuned!

I’m an engineer working professionally in San Diego, CA. I’m trying to improve every day and use this space to document. Connect: apetech.me/social

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